Sunday I was in the bathroom cleaning the tub and had one of those knock-you-on-your-butt strong memories. It hit me from out of no where and it was so overwhelming I almost started crying. The events came back to me in such vivid detail that I can’t believe that it’s been probably 8 or more years since they occurred. I’m not going to bore you or embarrass myself with the details, but I will say that it was all about my ex-husband. As I finished cleaning the bathroom I brooded over the memory and beat myself up for sticking with him for as long as I did.
After the bathroom sparkled I had to go downstairs to move the laundry to the dryer and had to walk past Waldo and Lily at the kitchen table having lunch. I rubbed Lil’s head, but didn’t linger in the kitchen. When I got back upstairs I realized that that brief contact with the two people I love the most in the world was like a breath of fresh air. The clouds parted and I could see clearly again.
6 years ago I made the easiest decision of my life; I wasn’t going to allow my Ex to ruin another second of my life. Rather then wallow and berate myself I rearranged our family room. I felt so much better when Waldo and Lily came upstairs and I got to show off all of my hard work.
My life is so different than it was when that memory originated I can hardly believe the same person lived it. This memory along with so many more during that time of my life were unpleasant, but I am so grateful for all of the wonderful memories I’ve formed over the last 6 years.
Oh this is so happy, and I am so relieved for you, too.
Steph